Hyped Up

Your race for the Heisman starts here

Per usual come July, the hype builds for the next season of NCAA Football. Not the real sport; that hype comes in August, but the game NCAA Football. The game is always solid, and people line up to find out what new features EA Sports have installed into the game. Last year it was the "Home field advantage... fear it or feast on it", where the home field player could make the crowd get rowdy and raucous. The noise would make the controller actually vibrate and would disrupt audible calls as the crowd roared louder. The best video game commercial I've probably ever seen was promoting home field advantage in NCAA 05, featuring Ohio State players going into Michigan's Big House, fearing the crowd (also the best UMichigan promotion I've seen). There also was the addition of the "match-up stick", where players could find mismatches by taking advantage of lower opponent morale at certain positions. This year, in NCAA Football 06, EA Sports has introduced "player progression". From high school summer camp to your senior year, you can lead a player from a walk-on prospect to Heisman holder. You live in a dorm room which is modest to begin with, but as you rise in the ranks of your team, your room becomes more glamorous. The more playing time your player gets and the better they perform, the better they become. As you improve, you eventually can take over one of the three "impact players" on your team, another added feature to this years' game. You have one impact player on offense, one on d, and one on either side of the ball. These guys are the gamebreakers of your team (remember NCAA Gamebreaker back in the day?). For Michigan, they would probably be Steve Breaston, Mike Hart, and maybe Gabe Watson (defensive leadership is now a question with Marlin Jackson and Ernest Shazor gone). Like I said, your goal is to take over one of these positions, and after that you're on the road to the Heisman. With all NCAA games, you can send your player to the pros in Madden.

Another new feature is "breakaway control". When the NBA Live series implemented the "total control" system (or whatever it was called I forget), when a players' special moves could be utilized using the thumbstick instead of the face buttons, it revolutionized the way the game was played. This is finally brought to football. In NCAA 06, the stick is used to perform jukes and quarterback sidesteps. In previous NCAA games, you have to turn off the passing icons to scramble. In NCAA 06, you don't have to do that anymore, you press the "A" button on the XBox to scramble with the passing icons up. This makes it easier to pass on the run and to move in the pocket, but I'm going to have to adjust to not having an "A" button to pass to. "A" was usually a receiver, while "Y" turned off the passing icons. Hopefully I can change this in the control menu.

EA Sports has also added four new mini-games: pass skeleton, oklahoma drill, and option and rushing attacks. Those who've played Madden know about the rushing attack mini-game; having an option attack would be pretty sweet. Pass skeleton is probably like the QB accuracy drills in Madden, while the oklahoma drill seems interesting. When I played football we only ran oklahomas a few times, I think it's along the lines of a modified suicide... I think it's 50 yards and back twice. I'd like to see how this comes out in a video game.


Mikey Hart gets clobbered by a Fuckeye

The University of Michigan has always been a big part of promotions for NCAA games, and considering how we have the best record in college football history, we damn well should be. U of M is always featured in the commercials and was featured in the aformentioned commercial for NCAA 05. This year, because Alex Smith isn't a big enough prospect even though he was the #1 NFL Draft pick, and because last years' Heisman Trophy winner, Matt Leinart, is going back to college, EA Sports didn't have a marketable enough player to put on the cover from last years' class. So they put a Wolverine throwback on the cover. Desmond Howard is featured on the cover of NCAA 06 in his infamous Heisman pose. Fuck yeah.


If only he did more when he was with the Lions...

NCAA Football 2006 comes out on July 12, so buy a copy and play me.

EA Sports
NCAA Football 2006

NewsRant Vol. 1

This section, and the NewsRants to come, will be dedicated to my views on the latest news developments.

1 - Lost In Paradise


One of the leading headlines this past month have been about Natalee Holloway, the 18 year old teen (not at all bad looking I might add) who disappeared on a high school graduation trip to Aruba. I'd like to point out that despite the fact there are thousands of lost children domestically, one rich white teenager lost abroad has made the top headlines everyday for the past month. Kinda ironic that I want to go into the media biz, except that I'd rather cover sports or entertainment than this normal, bullshit news.

If she was stupid enough to go off with a shady stranger she just met to a destination she didn't know, I say she deserves whatever fate she got. No doubt she was probably intoxicated despite the chaperones they were supposed to have, but it's a foreign country with different laws, so they probably couldn't prevent the kids from drinking. Still, every person should know their limit and should set a cutoff point. What's worse are this girls' friends. They should've realized she was leaving with an unknown and should've cockblocked his ass right away, or at least gone with them. They should arrest her friends, because they're just as responsible for her disappearance and possible death.

If this trip was school sanctioned, I think every single person on the administrative staff should be fired and prevented from ever working in the educational system again.

Now a search team from Texas is being sent in to try and find her, even though countless investigations have already failed. I don't know why the news kept emphasizing that the new crew was from Texas, are they sending in the Texas Rangers in or something? More media mishype.

You know where Natalee Holloway is? Most likely floating in the Carribbean Sea. Or at the bottom of it. They can search all they want on land, but what better place to hide a body than IN THE MIDDLE OF AN OCEAN? As you can tell, I think she's dead. I don't think this Joran Van der sloot guy hurt her, I buy his story of leaving her on the beach. She was probably passed out and after he couldn't revive her he probably just left. Afterwards I think she woke up and tried to go to her hotel, but was too fucked up and wound up getting picked up by the wrong people. Unfortunately, I don't think this story will have a Jessica Lynch-type ending, there are no Navy SEALs to rescue missing teens in paradise.

2 - This Is Freedom?


This is probably the most atrocious thing I've seen since 9/11. The United States Supreme Court ruled that the City Hall in New London, Connecticut was allowed to take seven private properties through eminent domain to make way for a hotel and convention center. While eminent domain is a right the government has, I believe this ruling really takes away from America's basic principles of freedom. How can we live in peace and harmony when we know our homes can be taken away from us to make room for goddamn malls and WalMarts? People have a right to their homes, they bought them and in some instances built them. Their property is private, not owned by the government, and if they decide to refuse sale to the government they should have that right. It shouldn't be the other way around, where the government plows over anything it desires. I think this ruling is bullshit, every judge on the Supreme Court should be kicked off after a severe berating (no, not a beating, a berating). When people lose homes they've owned for years and years and have passed them down for generations, when self-made businessmen have their companies taken away unwillingly to submit to the will of the government... that sir, is a chapter out of the dictator's handbook.

3 - The Dreaded Trump Card


Another Supreme Court outrage. The Supreme Court recently ruled that federal drug laws trump states’ compassionate use laws, including California’s Proposition 215, which allows for medicinal marijuana use. Because federal law outweighs state law, it basically makes Proposition 215 irrelevant. I don't really understand why they just wouldn't abolish the proposition altogether, it doesn't make sense to declare that their federal law trumps the state law and still have the state law exist when it conflicts. Not to mention this is kind of contradictory... they allow legal prostitution in the State of Nevada yet they ban marijuana in California... I would think the Supreme Court would rather ban the spread of aids than ban the spread of chilled outness, not to mention weed is worth a lot more to the American economy, but hey, I'm guess I'm just not an idiot like those "honorable" judges.

4 - Kick The Tires And Light The Fires


Once again, wildfires are sweeping across the west. Droughts lead to extremely dry areas, lighting storms light desert brush on fire, and the ensuing flames expand. On the news a firefighter described the flammable material as "live fuel" and "dead fuel", I guess depending on the type of plant each was. Well, that's what they are potentially: fuel. We've seen time and again that these brushes and plants are extremely flammable, so why don't we use this as some type of real fuel? Maybe not as a standalone fuel, but perhaps as an additive.

Maybe they've already tried to experiment with this, I don't know, but they should still give it a look-see. When it turns out that I was right and these plants are the first source of unlimited, renewable energy, I'll be waiting for my Nobel.

5 - Fuck The KKK


Edgar Ray Killen (a very fitting name), a former Klansman, was sentenced to 60 years in prison for orchestrating the slayings of three civil rights workers in 1964. Killen won't be eligible for parole for 20 years — when he's 100. If you ask me this guy should've gotten more than 60 years in prison. I don't care if he's 80 years old, people have been given the death sentence for less and people have been given life inprisonment for less. I want to see this guy crucified, then burned on a cross. Think of the joyous, wonderful irony it would bring.

The KKK are pieces of shit, fuck em. They're pussies who talk big shit but hide and keep a low profile so they can't be imprisoned for hate crimes. Why invade Iraq when you've got these terrorists on domestic soil? The KKK are no better than Nazis. If I had the means, I would line them all up and shoot them one by one. They had best hope they don't run into me, or else I'll be the one getting the 60 year sentence.

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That's all for now, more to come...

Poppin' Cristal

I'm burnt out on the commentary I can give on the Pistons. I haven't said enough, but I simply don't have the energy to go all out and write a whole 'nother article on the Stones. I've predicted every single series correct, and I was correct about Robert Horry making a game winning 3 point shot (I predicted it would be in Game 6, but hey, I still think it's a pretty damn good prediction). My final prediction for this series was Detroit in 7, and it will be so. All I want is one more championship. If the Pistons all disband and the starters leave, I'll be happy so long as we win tonight. The road to the NBA Finals is looooong. You have to play at least 16 games to get a ring. The regular season in the NBA is 82 games, so it's basically playing a whole quarter of the season all over again. It takes the heart of a champion to persevere and endure through the long grind.

We're back where we were against Miami: Game 7 on the road in a hostile environment, with all the critics picking the Stones to lose. But as the Pistons' motto says: "If it ain't rough, it ain't right." I found a phenomenal article on IGN.com. IGN is known mostly for their video game coverage, but they also have other "guy shit" about cars, sports, girls, music, movies etc. They are one of the places I'm targeting for employment after college. What better stuff to write about than the aforementioned? I read the article and it basically covered everything I would've written about the Pistons except they have some interviews with the players which I wouldn't have access to. I'm going to copy the article here, I'll also add the link so you can actually see it. Credits go to Jon Robinson of IGN.com.

Before I post the article, just remember what Rasheed said.

"They had their parade all scheduled for Thursday, but we're just gonna pop our cristal then."

http://sports.ign.com/articles/628/628029p1.html
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IGN » Sports » Basketball

NBA Finals: Against All Odds
The Pistons persevere in Game 6. Can they be the first team in NBA history to win the final two on the road?

by Jon Robinson
June 22, 2005 - If it ain't rough it ain't right.

That's the motto of the Detroit Pistons. A team of players acquired through trades, free agency, and the waiver wire. Players, it seemed, nobody else wanted. They said Chauncey Billups couldn't play the point. Said Rip Hamilton wasn't tough enough, Big Ben was too tough, McDyess would never jump again, and 'Sheed could never control his temper.

But now this unwanted group is one game away from doing what no other team in the history of the NBA has ever done - win Games 6 and 7 of the Finals on the road.

Not to mention turning a series that initially saw Spurs fans dusting off their brooms into one of the most compelling NBA Finals in years.

"I think it's just really a collection of all of us and all our struggles that we've been through and all the adverse times that we've had to overcome, all really combined into one," says Chauncey Billups. "That's why I think we're sometimes, I always think we're in situations, we're down at times but we're never out. Like I said, we just always fight and scratch and bite and pull ourselves out of that corner that we always back ourselves in."

They've sent bodies crashing to the floor, tipped in balls from underneath the basket, and thrown an elbow or two to get their point across. They also play with an unforgiving swagger of a team that feels like everyone is always out to get them.

"I think 'Sheed went out there and showed everybody that we are here, that we are defending champs," barks Ben Wallace. "When things aren't going well, we can go out and be mentally tough as well. I think Rasheed did a great job of getting us started with a good start, and kept his composure when things weren't going well for us. Then he came back in and closed the game and sealed the deal for us. So he showed some great mental toughness."

The mental toughness of a champ, especially after 'Sheed made the ultimate mistake in Game 5 and left Robert Horry open from behind the arc with the game on the line. Rasheed heard the talk. He heard the blame game being played. But he's heard it before, so 'Sheed did what he does best, when the talking gets loud, he plays even louder. And in Game 6, 'Sheed was in stereo.

"Even though I did a bonehead play the other night, I had to put it behind me. It was over with, just came out and had to play tonight. I mean, it's no pressure. I don't feel pressure. No matter if it's the game winning shot or I've got the ball on the last possession, I don't feel no pressure, because you've still got to go out there and play."

And the thing about 'Sheed, he plays just as loud from the bench.

"I've got to be heard. I can't be heard too much from sitting down on the bench so I still try to keep myself in the game even if I'm not in the game. I think that's what everyone on the bench does, everybody that stepped on the floor tonight contributed and everybody that was sitting on that bench tonight contributed."

And that energy from the bench can translate into points on the floor. "He (Rasheed) was very emotional. He was very vocal," Billups said after the game. "Even when he was on the bench in foul trouble, he's screaming out their plays, screaming on our plays, he's just Rasheed. I think that tough situation he went through the other day just really made him sharpen up his concentration today and his focus level. We're going to need that from him again in Game 7 , and we're going to need it from everybody."

The series has come down to one game. And it's a game as unpredictable as any in recent memory. How do you predict a series that saw the Spurs blow out the Pistons in the first two games, the Pistons blow out the Spurs in games three and four, the Spurs win a game in Detroit they weren't supposed to, then the Pistons beat off elimination in a game no one was giving them a chance to win?

"You know, the Spurs were undefeated against the Pistons, but stuff like that, just got to throw it out the window, man, and just play, just throw it out out there on the line," says Rasheed, chomping at his chance to play one more game. "Tonight we showed guts, we wanted to show the game guts Thursday."

The game guts of a team no one thought would be here. A team of players everyone had already counted out, now trying to add to their count of championships.

If it ain't rough it ain't right.

And it doesn't get any rougher than Game 7.

Underdogs, on the road, nobody expects them to win...the Pistons wouldn't want it any other way.
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Cristalicious

The Gamer Chronicles, Part 1

I'll admit, I've always been a gamer. I'm all about video and computer games; I think they're better than a book because while a book can take you to a far-away land on an adventure, a video game actually can give you the visuals, the sounds, the interactivity of it all. Plus they're a great way to pass the time and also to meet new people. Video games are basically electronic sports; while sports fine-tune your physical aspects, games do the same for your mind and hand-eye coordination. Thus, it is good to partake in both, and often.

Sometimes things happen in video games that the designers never intended to happen. And with the latest trend of MMORPGS, or Massive Multiplayer Online Role Playing Games, games with hundreds of thousands of people with no specific storyline and a whole world of open-endness, crazy crazy things can happen. I'll tell you a couple of stories of nutso adventures I've had, and will post more as they happen.

Star Wars Galaxies: The Total Experience
$29.99 + online fees.

The first takes place in the game Star Wars Galaxies: The Total Experience. I was a HUGE Star Wars geek as a kid, I had action figures, read the books, bought the comic books, had board games, etc. I loved the shit. I still like Star Wars, although I don't follow it as much as I previously did. In SWG, you can do most anything in Star Wars. SWG is a MMORPG, meaning there isn't a set plot in the game to follow like in a single player game; you're amongst hundreds of thousands of other real people online, and you can interact with them all (the problem is, you have to pay a monthly fee for being in such an environment, about $15 per month). Since there is no set storyline, the stuff you can do is endless: you can become a Rebel, Imperial, or just try to survive on your own. You can meet the big characters from the movies, and minor characters from books, comics, etc. You can also visit famous places from the movie like Jabba's Palace, the Mos Eisley Cantina, Naboo, and the Pit of Carkoon (remember that gross thing in the sand dunes in Return of the Jedi?). There are a bunch of different professions; I am trying to become a Master Pilot and a Smuggler. You can be a rifleman, a weaponsmith, a furniture or clothes maker/designer, a shipwright, a pirate, anything. And people take this shit seriously. WAY seriously. I've talked to shop owners who treat me as if I'm a customer in a real store, with upmost respect and courtesy. People use lingo and slang terms I haven't heard before, and act so naturally in the Star Wars environment that it makes the experience that much better.

I think one of the reasons people treat it so seriously is because the "credits", or the money in the Star Wars Universe, can be sold for REAL CASH. Yeah, people buy fake online money with real money. This is why I will probably be playing this game for a long time, looting ships and smuggling illegal weapons and spice for hard, cold, American green. You sell your credits in millions. It's unimaginable to make so much money when you begin the game; I've only played it a couple of weeks and have only had as much as 30,000, most of which went to upgrades for my ship. I've heard from veteran players that making lots of Star Wars moolah is easier as I become a master of my profession. The going exchange rate for credits to real money right now is 15 million (the minimum you must sell) credits is worth $45 in real life. 50 million credits is worth $150 REAL LIFE DOLLARS. Holy shit man. Fake money for real money? Fuck yes! And the site is a credible source as it's been around for 5 years. I guess they're used to dumbass geeks paying real money for video game cash. Wow.

So anyways, onto the story. Like I said, I'm a fledgling pilot right now, a freelance privateer (I prefer to stay out of the war between the Rebels and Imperials, choosing a side can have you winding up dead in a cantina), doing odd jobs for smuggling crews to earn money and upgrades for my ship. A good thing about being in a MMORPG is that if you get lost, veteran players can help you out. Oftentimes they give you tips on how to get by, and can actually teach you skills. On one such encounter, I was speaking with a guy called Saruman. Saruman was a master pilot, and had much more experience than I did. I chatted with him for awhile and he gave me some tips. Later in the conversation he asked me if I want to take a ride with him on his YT-1300 Cruiser. The YT-1300 is the same type of ship as Han Solo's Millenium Falcon, except that the Falcon is much more modified than the stock YT. Seeing as how I hadn't had ridden in one before and I needed a ride back to Tattooine where my ship was docked, I decided to join his crew. First, Saruman wanted to fly around with me and some green skinned chick as the gunners, taking out pirates for experience. I thought I would get pilot experience as a gunner on his ship, but I was wrong.

We left the station and went into space. It was like that one scene where Han yells, "Get to the turrets!" and they all sprint off to them. Pretty cool. Me and the chick ran, and after eventually finding it, I got in. We started gunning down the incoming pirate ships, when I noticed Saruman was getting all the loot. See, after you destroy a ship, you get all the credits the pilot was carrying, along with any loot they had. Loot could be a ship component, guns, or anything random. Me and the chick were shooting down the targets, but Saruman was getting all the credits and the loot. Oh well, I thought, I might as well get the pilot experience from this. "Hey," I radioed to Saruman, "I get pilot XP for this, right?" He responded that no, I don't get pilot experience, I would only get gunner experience. Gunner experience wouldn't do me any good unless I was to become a permanent part of his or some other captains' crew, and I am no ones' crew member but my own. I'm not going to make a profession of working for this guy, especially when he hoards all the booty.

"Fuck this," I thought to myself. Covertly, I left the turret and snuck around the ship, looking for a way out. "Why isn't the second turret firing?" Saruman broadcasted on the speakers. Ignoring him, I ran to the escape pod, got in, and hit the switch. Before he realized what had happened, I had escaped his ship and landed on the planet. I never talked to him again.


Ejection

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Medal of Honor: European Assault
$39.99

The second story comes from the game Medal of Honor: European Assault. The Medal of Honor series has done a good job of making the games deliver a cinematic experience. In one of the MoH games, Rising Sun, had the beginning of the game exactly like the movie Pearl Harbor. It made the players feel like they were in the movie itself. MoH: European Assault does the same thing. I will give a game review of this later.

This situation happened on a couple of occasions, but I'll give you a story of a particularly humorous experience. I was in St. Nazaire, France, on a mission to destroy V2 Rocket hulls to slow down Nazi V2 Rocket production, and to eliminate a Nazi Major. I had already taken out the hulls, singlehandedly destroyed a docked U-Boat, gunned down waves of Nazis, and was at the door of Horst Brenner, my target to assassinate. I opened the door so I could peer in and evalute the situation. You are given three squad members in most missions you can give orders to and who support you and give you cover fire. The problem is, the friendly AI isn't that good. I was looking around the room when one of my squad members blindly charged into the room, only to get cut down by a squad of Nazis and Brenner, who was on an emplaced machine gun. I threw a grenade in the room to take some of the Nazis out, and sprinted into the room behind cover. My remaining two squadmates took cover beside me. When Brenner stopped to reload, I peeked out from behind my cover and took aim. I aimed right for his head and pulled the trigger when another of my squadmates ran and stood directly in my sights to fire at Brenner. I fired about five shots into my squadmates' head before I could stop. The helmet he had on did absoultely nothing.

Hoping my remaning squad member wouldn't do anything stupid, I emptied the rest of my clip into Brenner, but he still stood. As I reloaded, my last squadmate, taking action, tossed a grenade. The grenade flew straight up in the air, bounced off the catwalk above him, and landed right at his feet. Shit! I ran out from my cover to evade the frag, forgetting Brenner was still up there with his MG. He cut me down and as I lay dying, I saw my squadmate still hiding behind cover, thinking his grenade had hit Brenner. "Stupid AI!" I thought as it exploded, killing my squadmate and making me start over from the very beginning.

Now, Medal of Honor: European Assault is a wonderful game, but the friendly AI could use a HUGE overhaul so they don't run into your line of fire and calculate the trajectory of their grenades a bit more.


Dammit man I'm trying to fire a bazooka, get out of the way!
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These are some of the wacky adventures I've had playing video games, more to come...

About My Facebook Picture

Occasionally I like to switch my pictures on facebook. The first picture on there was my black and white football pic, the second was my "gangsta" picture from pregaming, the third was my picture from Brad's party when I was looking into the barrell of a Nerf gun, and the fourth and current picture is one from spring break. Here they are:

1.

Football

2.

Gangsta pregaming

3.

Blam

4.

Cancun

Now I know the last spring break picture looks kinda fruity. In fact, I got a couple of messages on facebook saying it was:

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[ Read Message ]


Message from ------ ----


From: ------ ----
To: Ken Uy
Subject: Hey
Message: your pic, is very interesting!!!
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Then my buddy Simon Yi posted on my wall: why is there a man on your butt? a man should not be near your butt.

Ok. Let me straighten something out. I'm NOT gay. Even though you all already know that I'm going to do it just for the sake of my psyche. I have nothing against gay people but I am not nor never will be gay. In the picture, Brad had to lean over me because otherwise he wouldn't be in the picture, not to mention it would put him next to his girlfriend Shelly. Here's the full picture:



So as you can see there's nothing wrong going on in this picture, I don't want to hear any further comments about it.

Damn I miss Cancun.

Going Toe To Toe

Sky

Tonight the heart of a champion will be tested. Tonight it's game 7 of the Eastern Conference Finals. Tonight is the definition of going for broke, of a must win, of truly giving it your all. We SPANKED the Heat at home, big time, and Wade or no Wade, there was no chance the Heat had a chance in that game. If you couldn't count on Rasheed's guarantee (where he'd been 2-0 before) or the fact the reigning world champs were at home facing elimination, you could count on the fact the NBA was going to set this up as a seven game series. The two sweeps Miami had in the first two rounds wouldn't make as much money as the most anticipated matchup in the NBA in a few years, so the league wants to drag it out. Don't think otherwise; the league may not have the power to control the shots players make or the rebounds they grab, but they have more power than you think and they for damn sure can influence a seven game series.

The Pistons were against the ropes, but now they've evened the odds with a strong knockdown to Miami. A 25 point victory is a statement (it would've been 27 if not for a last second jam), and even though Miami fans will cry it's about DWade being hurt, it just goes to show how most of the NBA squads are predicated upon one or two all-star players. Most teams have a superstar (if they're fortunate, two) who carries the team on their back, doing most of the scoring, rebounding, blocking, or maybe all of em, a la Kevin Garnett. But what has made the Pistons great since Grant Hill and Jerry Stackhouse left is the fact that the Pistons have NO all-stars. Yeah, that might seem weird to all the non-Michigan people reading this, but it's true. Ben Wallace might be considered an all-star, and is probably the most widely known of the Pistons, considering he's been elected to the all-star team the past couple of years, but he has no offense. He is the heart and soul of Detroit, and is an all-star in our hearts, but to truly be an all-star, you have to have both parts of the game (and as much as you believe Ben has offense, he really doesn't... I cringe everytime he takes a jump shot). Rasheed Wallace was an all-star in Portland, but since he's come to Detroit he really hasn't been. In Portland, he was averaging 20 and 8; in D-Town, only 14 and 8. But yet he still plays an integral role here; he is no longer the man, and as much as that takes away from his all-star status, it serves him well because the pressure isn't on him so much. Chauncey Billups has been a vagabond up to his signing with Detroit, and despite the fact he has found a home here and that he won the Finals MVP last year, he still hasn't achieved that all-star status. The biggest knock on him is that he's a shooting guard in a point guard position, that he scores too much from the point guard spot. PLEASE don't be stupid. Since when are point guards supposed to be passers? The reason Steve Nash is getting so much attention this year is BECAUSE he is a passing point guard, BECAUSE the concept is becoming revived. We haven't seen a purely passing point guard in years and years, so don't go criticizing Chauncey Billups for being a 2 in a 1 spot; his big shots should be worth it. Rip Hamilton hasn't achieved all-star status either, despite the fact he's the leading scorer on the NBA champ team. Tayshaun Prince isn't there yet, but he will. It just goes to show you that you DON'T NEED an all-star to win it all, you need TEAMWORK and HEART. The Motor City Bad Boys, the Pistons who won the back-to-back Champions in 89' and 90', they all had different integral role players - Isiah Thomas, Joe Dumars, Bill Laimbeer, Dennis Rodman, Vinnie Johnson, Adrian Dantley, Mark Aguirre. They won with teamwork. The big three categories in basketball, scoring, rebounds, and assists, are held by THREE DIFFERENT PLAYERS on the Detroit Pistons (factor in FG%, and that's Antonio McDyess, a fourth different player to lead a category). Look at Minnesota, where Kevin Garnett leads all three categories. Sure, it looks good on his card, but the teams success doesn't reflect upon it. Phoenix is another great team. They're comprised of a team of all-stars, which is why they were the best team in the NBA, but the key to their success is teamwork. The other key to success is defense, which is why they didn't beat San Antonio, but is the reason Detroit will beat Miami.

No doubt the critics and the fans in Miami will bitch about DWade being hurt after we beat them, but too bad, shit happens. If say, Ben Wallace or Chauncey Billups were to go down, what would Miami fans say? Absolutely nothing. So too bad, take it like a man and shut the fuck up. Wade is an amazing player and I personally think is better than Carmelo, but if you believe in fate, him and the Heat are not destined to win tonight. You can say the timing of Wade getting hurt is bullshit. But here's another example. On the TV show The Contender, where boxers fought against each other to win $1 million, one of the guys came down with chicken pox during the event. Of all the times to get chicken pox, it had to be now, during the biggest moment of this guys' life. He took it like a man and withdrew from the tournament, and the Heat and their fans have to do the same. Bitch about Wade, but again, it just goes to show how reliant Miami is upon him. If Ben Wallace were to go down, McDyess would step in; if Chauncey, Arroyo or Lindsey would. Sure, they wouldn't be as good, but they would get the job done. Miami's bench is overrated, with the dipshit Keyon Dooling (I really hate him with a passion) and Rasual Butler leading the way. Only Alonzo Mourning makes a real impact for them; once we get him and Shaq in foul trouble, it's down to draft bust Michael Doleac and former dropped Piston Christian Laettner. Of course Wade is going to try and play, because this is the biggest game of his life. He definitely won't be 100%, probably not even 75%, because an injury like that isn't going to heal after one days' rest, but no doubt he'll try his best.

Under no circumstances can we take Wade's injury too lightly... and I don't think we will. We have to try and hurt him, maybe give him a shot or two to those ribs. You may be laughing, but I'm dead serious. There was one game against Sacramento last year where the Pistons beat the SHIT out of Brad Miller. First, Zeljko Rebraca thought he was fouled badly, so he punched Miller in the back of his head. On the next play out of NOWHERE Corliss Williamson (ironically, now with Sacramento) ran and literally DECKED Brad Miller. I remember the replays, Brad Miller went flying; the hit was harder than an NFL tackle. Brad Miller was crying. Next, after both Zelly and Corliss had been ejected, Rip Hamilton jumped in the air and "accidentally" kicked Miller in the nads. All this happened within two minutes. We stick out for each other, that's for damn sure. I'm certainly not saying we should go to these extremes against Wade; he's a good guy and a great player, but what I'm proposing is to do little things. When Wade goes into a post up, whoever is guarding him should put his defending hand right on those ribs. A flak jacket can only do so much protection. We should trap him constantly, make him twist and turn to protect the ball, and make him try to make a pass when he's in a compromised position. Whenever he goes up and we foul him, we should make sure to foul him real hard, maybe even get a flagrant. You might think this is morally wrong, but I'll tell you that as long as you win, it doesn't matter how you get there. The ends justify the means. If I was a professional wrestler, you'd see me poking eyes and doing low blows all the time.



THERE IS NO SHAME IN VICTORY.

If winning means taking out the opposing teams' best player, then WHY NOT DO IT? Because it's wrong? Get a new mindset, this isn't a goddamn comic book, this is real life. Personally, I think Wade will have a great game, but it simply won't be enough.

Some expert predictions:
*ESPN's experts selected Detroit to win game 7 with a 7-3 vote.
*Yahoo! Sports NBA analysts Steve Kerr (working the game tonight) and Dan Wetzel have picked Detroit to win
*All three of CBSSportline.com's "experts" (expert meaning fucking moron in this case) have picked Miami to win, two of them predicted in six games, one in seven.
*The Las Vegas line is Miami -1.5, but as a betting man I'll tell you that that small of a line in a game this big is negligible, it will probably turn into a pick 'em by 7 PM. This could be the most wrong line since Indy was only -7 to the Detroit Lions on Thanksgiving Day.

*I've predicted the first two rounds correctly, Detroit over Philly in 5 and Detroit over Indy in 6 (if you don't believe me, look at my AIM profile, they've been sitting there before the playoffs have begun), and I've also predicted Detroit over Miami in 7. I haven't been wrong so far, and I definitely won't be tonight.

We have more game 7 experience than Miami. We live for this shit. We're going to step up to the plate and knock one out of the park. It's the end of the line for Larry Brown; if we lose, he's gone, he might as well get one more ring. Of all the "it's" to be "this-sed", this is it. With that, I'll leave you with the chorus from Nelly's song "Heart of a Champion".

Ain't no way they can stop me now
Cause I'm on my way, I can feel my rain comin
It's the blood of a champion
Pumpin deep inside my veins, too much pride to be runnin
I'ma get what I can and more, even if
My blood, my sweat, and my tears don't mean nothin
It's the heart of a champion in me


Get it again

Three Pieces Of Apparel I Want To Buy

We all have our personal preferences when it comes to wardrobes; we all like to dress in a certain way. The way I dress depends on the situation, where I'm going, etc., and I'm sure it's the same with you, except that when I get flashy, I get goddamn pretentious. If you remember in high school a few days I went with all the same color: I had my UMichigan hat, yellow American Eagle shirt with yellow Polo undershirt, yellow Abercrombie shorts, and yellow Abercrombie flip flops. I've also gone all red before. For prom, while everyone had the traditional black on black, I had a turquoise tux. While I can be this meretricious (in a good way), I can be just as plain. Most times I'll just wear a tshirt and sweatpants to wherever. Anyways, there are three items of apparel I want to buy this summer besides the typical stuff. These are different because they're novelty items.


No, it's not a drug deal, this was before prom.

1. Jesse Brinkley Workout Shirt - $23.95 w/ free shipping


If you ever watched The Contender, or at least the finale, you'll know who Jesse Brinkley is. He made it to the 3rd place, $250,000 fight, but lost to Alfonso Gomez. Jesse was famous on the show for being a power puncher, and also for coming up with the awesome phrase, "Put up, shut up, go hard, or go home!" You've probably seen this on my away messages, it's my new workout slogan for the "Ken's-get-right-for-the-summer-workout plan". I actually already bought this and it should be arriving within a few days.

2. Busted Tees Oregon Trail Shirt - $17.99 plus S+H



Hilarious. Oregon Trail rules.

3. Desert Camo Marine BDU Cap - $7.97 plus S+H



Awesome. Good way to support the troops too.

Like I said, I already have the Jesse Brinkley shirt, but I barely have enough money to get the other two, I have to wait until I have some financial stability. Goddamn I need a job.

JesseBrinkley.com
BustedTees
CheaperThanDirt

Congrats To JDizzy

My buddy Jason Dizik, better known as Diz, has always had a great announcers voice, and combine that with his seemingly limitless sports knowledge, and you've got an ideal sports broadcaster. JDiz volunteered (or paid? I dunno) to announce football games at NF, and he was the one who gave me my nickname, The KTrain. During my captain's speech at my football banquet, I was listing down people to thank, and Diz was among them. He even gave me a couple of interviews on the local TV station, announced me as a "football star" heh, and even though the interview went south pretty fast, I appreciated the opportunity. The other interview I did was when I came back from college for one of the football games. I did the shit they do on ESPN where retired football players show the viewers how to correctly do stuff; I was taped live showing how running backs are supposed to take a handoff.

Partying with Diz is awesome, he only drinks wine because it has less calories than beer or hard liquor. He watches his calories because honestly, he used to be pretty huge. He is probably the biggest success story I've ever seen when it comes to losing weight. He used to be 300+ and after working out REAL hard over last summer, he's now below 200. Yeah, he burned that much. I worked out a couple of times with him and I couldn't even keep up, he goes on the elliptical for an hour at a really fast pace, AFTER lifting and doing abs. He burns at least 1,000 calories alone on the elliptical, and combine that with eating right... it's no wonder how he lost so much weight. I feel kinda akward because he weighs less than me now, but oh well I guess I can use that as a goal or motivation to work out hard. So anyways, partying with him is pretty fun, he gets pretty goddamn drunk, and he is quite the bigot when intoxicated (he's a bigot anyways but is more vocal about it when drunk). It's funny to see him throw racial slurs around at random people, and even funnier to play Madden with him when fucked up. We pissed off Brad one night when we were going to play a game of Madden with 12 minute quarters, but Brad kept yelling at us to shut if off (it was about 2:30 in the morning) so we stopped.

Diz goes to Central Michigan under their Broadcast and Cinematic Arts program, and as a sophomore next year will be their highest ranked staff member aside from the instructors. When Peyton Manning visited CMU to talk about some charity program he runs, Diz got the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to talk with the quarterback with the most touchdowns in NFL history. Diz got an internship this summer to WDFN Sports 1130 The Fan, I remember he would call into the station when our football team would win games (when I played), and now he's working for them. He is listed on the Detroit Sports Broadcasters Association (DSBA) as a registered broadcaster, among the ranks of Detroit sportscaster Mark Champion, Fox 2 reporters Jennifer Hammond and Dan Miller, sportscaster Bob "Wojo" Wojnowski, and the voice of the World Champion Detroit Pistons himself, George Blaha. It's safe to say that some of the most influential media personas in Michigan are members of the DSBA, and the cool thing is that Diz is featured in their "Member Spotlight". I'll place the link below, whether or not he's in the member spotlight still depends on how long you wait to see it after I've posted this article. So congrats to Diz, when you make it to the big show, broadcasting Monday Night Football or something, don't forget the first (and greatest) nickname you gave out, to me, the KTrain. Oh, and hook me up with a job then too.

Detroit Sports Broadcasters Association Member Spotlight - Jason Dizik
Detroit Sports Broadcasters Association


I'm in the middle of this picture. The guy to the left of me (picture-wise) got to interview this guy (see below)

Hottie Of The Month - June

Maggie Q

The first time I saw Maggie Q (Q for Quigley, she just goes by it for some reason, I guess cause it sounds cool), it was in my favorite foreign film (aside from Jackie Chan movies), Gen Y Cops. Being a model, she's naturally gorgeous. She was born in Hawaii but she works mostly in Hong Kong now, and hasn't hit it big as an actress yet but had a role in Rush Hour 2 (the scene at the beginning where Chris Tucker tries to speak Chinese to the girls in the car, she's one of the girls), Around The World In 80 Days, and her latest movie is Naked Weapon. She's been in Maxim, on MTV, several Chinese commercials, and hopefully will become a bigger star in the future. Yow.

Maggie Q's Official Website

Against The Ropes

Auto response from BStul86: uh oh....someone got their internet back....in exchange for their favorite basketball team....

At first glance, the final score of last night's game between the Pistons and the Heat doesn't seem out of the ordinary. The smallest margin of victory so far in this series has been six points. Games always have been close towards the end of the game, and in the last few minutes a team pulls away, winning by an average of 8.5 points. However, the story was different in Game 5. With the series tied at 2-2, the Pistons really, REALLY blew it. The technical definition of a "must win" is when a team faces elimination if they lose the game. Aside from that, this game was a must win, because if the Pistons were to lose, they'd have to win two straight games, the final one being in Miami. They wound up choking, and now have to win back-to-back games against the team with the best record in the East.


Ben's thoughts on the Pistons' Game 5 loss to the Heat: "Ah shit, we're fucked now."

I admit, I was working out until about 9 (my body felt broken earlier in the day), and sped to get home so I could catch the game. Much to my dismay, the score was 47 - 27. I had to do a double take because a 20 point lead is pretty ridiculous, not to mention damn near insurmountable. The chronic problem the Detroit Pistons have had since the Rick Carlisle era began can be summed up in one word: inconsistency. The Pistons lose by 15 to terrible teams like the Golden State Warriors and Atlanta Hawks, and beat the select few better than them by 20. Detroit is streaky, and many of their games are nailbiters. The games are exciting, don't get me wrong, but I'd rather we beat every team by a lot. Remember a couple of years ago when Chauncey Billups had 3 or 4 buzzer beating game winning 3 pointers? That was only a handful of close games we had that season. We don't know how to close teams out. We get up by 13, 15, 18, then the other team slowly climbs their way back. Fortunately the opposite is also true. We somehow get down by 17 points, then make our way back up to take the lead. Unfortunately in those situations, Rasheed Wallace tends to shoot 3 pointers to try to be the hero instead of going inside with his 6'11" frame.

More on that. Rasheed Wallace was the catalyst last year that helped us to the NBA title, the X-Factor if you will. The problem with Rasheed is is that he loves the 3 point line. It's DAMN good that he has that range, and it's a very, very important weapon in our arsenal, but late in games he seems to drift out rather than try to pound inside to get a foul. Against Miami, whenever he's gone inside he usually gets fouled (last night the exception because of bullshit dickref calls), but whenever we're up by 2 or 3 and need points late in the game, he launches unneccesary 3s when he knows damn well he would probably get a foul if he went inside. He has some hero complex where he has to be the one to make the big shot, when that job is already assigned to Mr. Big Shot Chauncey Billups. If you recall Rasheed's very first game with Detroit, he tried to be the hero then with a last second 3 pointer, but he choked. Sheed has had a few big late shots, but the costs outweigh the benefits. In the playoffs this year, he's been fairly consistent, but he really plays a bigger factor than I think people realize. After doing some research, I've calculated that for Detroit to win a game, Rasheed needs at least 20 points and 5 rebounds. Early in the playoffs he had some REAL shitty games, and it seemed like he was high (or perhaps it was the lack of) when he was playing defense. He missed so many assignments and oftentimes left his man open for an easy dunk. The reason Reggie Miller played so well against us was because Rasheed wasn't switching correcly on pick and rolls; he was backing off and giving Reggie a free shot. He's tightened down his game some though, and he usually steps up after he guarantees a game. He's guaranteed Game 6, and if I were a betting man (and I am, but I have no money) I would take Detroit. Game 6 is basically a lock, and the Pistons are already favored by 6. We're at home, it's a must win, and Dwayne Wade will probably sit out to wait until Game 7 with his injured rib muscle. The only concern is Game 7 in Miami.



+



=


Sheed needs his weeeeeeeeed

The Larry Brown issue I will cover in a differnt article, but as Rip Hamilton said, they're not going to really play for Larry Brown, they're going to play for themselves. This isn't high school or college basketball you morons, this is the NBA. Most of the players are grown adults (not Darko) and are self indulgent and selfish. All the coach does for them is call plays and find weaknesses in the opponents' game. Yeah, Larry Brown is special to the players because he brought them a ring and is a great teacher, but don't think they're going to try and win a championship for him. They look out for number one, themselves, because of the ring THEY will get and the publicity THEY will get, not what Larry Brown gets. Not to mention this whole Larry Brown thing probably distanced the players from LB, not made them closer.


You can forget about three, it's two and out for LB

Regardless of what happens with Detroit, Larry Brown is going to retire and will become the president of the Cleveland Cavaliers. It's basically set in stone and it's easy to see through LB's bullshit. The only reason all the information was leaked was because the Cavs pushed LB to make a decision because they were looking at other candidates. With LB's health, it's obvious to see he'd take the job in a second. Being the president of a team has a significant less amount of stress than being a coach does. If the Pistons manage to get out of this hole and win the title, then two things will happen. The Pistons will either all break up or they'll keep playing under a new coach, hopefully either Phil Jackson or Flip Saunders, although Flip Saunders is way overrated. Again, in either case, Larry Brown is gone. If the Pistons lose, our starters are all going to stay, and on our bench, Elden will probably retire, McDyess might look elsewhere, Dupree sucks so he's probably gone (admit it, he's NOT that good, tell me what he's done lately), the management will finally realize Darvin Ham is good for nothing and drop him. Carlos and Carlos will stay, and Darko will finally get a chance to shine. Believe me, he's going to be something special, don't be a dumbass fool and say he won't be. Joe Dumars hasn't failed yet and I doubt he will with Darko. If you've played NBA Live in Dynasty Mode and simulated into the future, you'd see that Darko will be great; in fact, he was MVP of the league for 5 years in both NBA Live 2004 AND 2005.


HAHAHAHALOLLMAOROFLBWHAHAHA... but seriously, Darko will be sweet... not in the near future, but sometime

THE BOTTOM LINE IS is that we've got an uphill battle; we're against the ropes, and we're down. BUT... we're NOT out, we just have to take things one game at a time. Now is the time to pull everything out of our asses, from Darko scoring 20 and getting 10 rebounds to Ben Wallace shooting 3s (he does in practice; Detroit Pistons practice doesn't start until Ben makes two 3s). Now is the time for miracles to happen, fuck Christmas. Now is the time for the Detroit Pistons to play their usual role as the underdog, and as usual, shock the world.


Two-peat

I Talked To Graham Brown Today

What a goofass...

So after class today I went to the CCRB, continuing my double-session-a-day "Ken's-get-right-for-the-summer-workout plan". The order of workouts for today goes like this: shootaround, boxing, elliptical, and when I got back home, hardcore running up bleachers at NF. I want to be cut when schooltime rolls around; I don't need a six-pack by then, but I'd like to be in a position to get one. I don't want to lift until schooltime because I'm afraid that if I lift, the excess weight I have on now will turn into muscle, and I'll be bulky. Actually, it's not really excess fat, I weigh the same as I did at the beginning of the year, except all the muscle I have turned into fat. In fact, I weight less because of it (remember, muscle weighs more than fat). But I'd still like to cut some pounds before lifting again, so I've built up a regimen of aerobic workouts until I do.

So anyways, I was doing the shootaround when a really tall guy walked into the gym. I didn't look at him at first, but at second glance I realized he was Graham Brown, starting center and captain of the Michigan basketball team. He was taller than the usual tall of course, basketball player tall. Whenever you see a university athlete, whether they start or benchwarm, it's like seeing a movie star, shock and awe. This meeting marked the second time I talked to Graham (I talked to him once during second semester when he was sitting outside of my classroom), and about the fourth or fifth time I've talked to a big-time athlete. I've talked to and shook hands with the #3 overall draft pick himself, the big #1 Braylon Edwards; every time he catches a touchdown I can say I shook that hand. I've played basketball with former UM bball player Lavell Blanchard and once talked to Lions tight end Casey Fitzsimmons at a Pistons game. I met a few Pistons back in the day when I went to Jerome Williams' (now with the Knicks) basketball camp too.


Hoo hoo big B

Anyways, I talked to Graham for a few minutes, asking about the team, how the squad looks, where the hell Mio, Michigan is (farther up north but not the UP), etc. Afterwards I continued my shootaround, glancing over occasionally to see how he was shooting. At first he was missing shots from five feet away from the basket, and for a span of about 10 minutes, my 3-point shooting percentage was higher than his jumpshot percentage. I was hitting about 50% of my 3s, Graham was hitting about 30% of his 2s. As he warmed up though, he started hitting more and more shots, and quickly passed me. One thing to note about Graham Brown though, is that he is extremely SLOW. His pump fakes were basically in slow motion, kinda like "bullet time" in the The Matrix. He's got a decent spin move, but he executes the motion so fast (kinda contradictory, I know...) he probably won't make the shot at game speed.


Graham Brown's pump fakes are this fast

Hopefully Graham Brown and the rest of the Michigan basketball team can get healthy this year and also avoid girlfriend choking incidents. Only then will we have a shot at the tournament.


Sandwiched

Graham Brown
In The Lane With Graham Brown
MGoBlue Men's Basketball